


I will sing

by more_than_starlight



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-08
Updated: 2019-07-08
Packaged: 2020-06-24 09:56:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19721329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/more_than_starlight/pseuds/more_than_starlight
Summary: I honestly don't know how to describe this, but hopefully it's good.





	I will sing

**Author's Note:**

> The lyrics mentioned are copied directly from Google as the lyrics for Requiem from Dear Evan Hansen. 
> 
> The song has been stuck in my head all day, so I wrote this in the car on the way to a restaurant for my brother's birthday. Sorry if the format's weird, it's posted from my cell.

Why should I play this game of pretend?

Tony knelt over the lifeless body in front of him, his whole body shaking.

Remembering through a secondhand sorrow?  
Such a great son and wonderful friend  
Oh, don't the tears just pour

Tony's eyes clouded with tears that he could not wipe away, as both his arms were both still encased in their gauntlets.

I could curl up and hide in my room  
There in my bed, still sobbing tomorrow

He felt numb to the chaos surrounding him- the sounds of Natasha yelling orders, the police sirens blaring, the general noise of a group of aliens being corralled into S.H.I.E.L.D. containment trucks to be taken away.

I could give in to all of the gloom  
But tell me, tell me what for

He felt the armor slowly retreating, the nano particles withdrawing their hold over his body, returning to their housing unit, right over where the arc reactor used to be.

Why should I have a heavy heart?  
Why should I start to break in pieces?  
Why should I go and fall apart for you?

His chest felt hollow, the space that the arc reactor no longer occupied still pressing against his lungs, his ribs, his heart.

Why should I play the grieving girl and lie  
Saying that I miss you  
And that my world has gone dark without your light?  
I will sing no requiem tonight

Their relationship wasn't the steadiest he had, but he treasured the fragile thing it had been after the "Civil War", as it had been called- he would mourn the strong dependence on another it could have become.

I gave you the world, you threw it away  
Leaving these broken pieces behind you

He had tried- tried to get him acclimated, tried to help him, to be an anchor in the storm of new, overwhelming reality after it had all went down, after they had come back, came home.

Everything wasted, nothing to say  
So I can sing no requiem

The shield, still as perfect as the idea of what the man had been laid next to the lifeless man, the symble of a man that never was.

I hear your voice, I feel you near  
Within these words, I finally find you  
And now that I know that you are still here  
I will sing no requiem tonight

The way he was, really was, was nothing like the way Tony had heard about, nothing like the character Tony had been measured against his whole life, the one he could never measure up too.

Why should I have a heavy heart?

Why should I say I'll keep you with me?  
Why should I go and fall apart for you?

But even though they were fine, had made up at the end and everything should have been ok, Tony still held that small bit of resentment against him, the seed that had been in his soul for his whole existence, that he couldn't be let go of, not after years of being not as good, never as good, never good enough.

Why should I play the grieving girl and lie  
Saying that I miss you and that my world has gone dark without your light? (I can see your light)  
I will sing no requiem  
Tonight

Tony could not say that he would grieve for Captain America- he, of course would do so publicly, the media would be in a frenzy, but alone, he would grieve for Steve- the tiny, artistic guy from Brooklyn that his Aunt Peggy had told him so much about as a child when all he had heard from Howard were the stories of Captain America.

'Cause when the villains fall, the kingdoms never weep  
No one lights a candle to remember  
No, no one mourns at all  
When they lay them down to sleep

Awarbess was slowly leaking back in, Bucky crying on Sam's, Natasha's face stern as she lightly leans on Clint while talking to the newest agentreplacing Coulson, and Strange...

So, don't tell me that I didn't have it right  
Don't tell me that it wasn't black and white  
After all you put me through  
Don't say it wasn't true  
That you were not the monster  
That I knew

Strange had grabbed Loki, and the two were heading toward him, their expressions soft and arms linked.

'Cause I cannot play the grieving girl and lie  
Saying that I miss you And that my world has gone dark

Tony, a statue beside the fallen man, tears streaming silently down his face, grieving for what could have been.

I will sing no requiem

I will sing no requiem

I will sing no requiem tonight


End file.
